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Slices of Life from the Dancing Pony

I’ll Train Your Puppy If You’ll Dance With Me

By heather.rainier
The Dancing Pony pickup line of the week is…

‘Tis the season here in Divine and lots of people are busy shopping at the stores and doing their visiting around town. We tend to see people in the nightclub we don’t normally see any other time of year.

There’s a gentleman I’m friends with who lives way outside of town. Sam is in his fifties, lives alone, and his farm is mostly self-sustaining. His wife died when he was in his twenties, before they had any kids.

Given his persistent  lack of a social life, I don’t think he’s ever gotten over her loss.

Anyway, I saw Sam in town looking at the Christmas lights. While we were chatting, he told me that Christmas was about the only time he could ever get his wife, Chrissy, to come to town to do more than just the usual grocery shopping because she liked the lights so much.

I invited him to come by the Pony early one evening, before it got too crowded, for a little holiday cheer. It wasn’t a sure thing that he’d actually show up but I needed to at least invite him.

He surprised me and came in early on Saturday, sat at the bar, and we chatted for a while. Over the course of the conversation, he told me he was in need of a good working dog, since his last one died recently. The dog’s name was Com’ere, short for “Come Here.” Sam obviously appreciates simplicity.

While we were talking, a couple of women came in after a day of Christmas shopping and sat down the bar from Sam.

I noticed one of the ladies eyeing Sam as though she recognized him.

She got the bartender’s attention and he told her who Sam was. Recognition dawned and it was obvious she was trying to catch Sam’s eye.

Happy to help a lady out, the bartender mentioned that they were trying to keep Sam at the bar while I got in touch a friend who owned a cow dog that’d recently had a litter of puppies. He suggested she could help by striking up a conversation with him. The pretty woman walked over to Sam and said, “You’re Sam Haines, right?”

Sam nodded shyly. “Uh, yes ma’am.”

“I’m Brenda Miller. Do you remember me from high school?”

Sam blinked and then he smiled. “Yes ma’am. You were the nice cheerleader.”

A pink blush filled her cheeks and she replied, “That’s sweet of you to say. I hope I deserved that title.”

Sam said, “Yes ma’am. You were the only pretty girl who ever said ‘hi’ to me in school.

I was too redneck for everyone else.”

A little frown crossed her brow at the way he referred to himself but then she smiled and eased into the seat beside him. “It’s nice to be recalled kindly like that but I remember you as the strong silent handsome type. Actually, I’d always hoped you would ask me out but…then we graduated and I moved away for college.”

He seemed at a loss as to what to say to that but Brenda filled the gaps until he gradually slipped into a warm conversation with her. It was gratifying, watching the way she set him at ease.

While they were talking, I was got in touch with my friend and he was more than happy to bring the newly weaned puppies up to the nightclub parking lot for Sam to see. When they arrived, Brenda went outside with Sam to see them.

Sam zeroed in quickly on the one he liked and Brenda fell in love with one of them as well. She was pulling out her wallet to pay for it when Sam told her to put her money away. “I’m paying for your puppy, if you’re sure you want her. It’s the least I can do, Brenda. I haven’t had such a nice conversation with a member of the opposite sex in years.

I feel like I’ve come out of hibernation, thanks to you.”

Brenda’s cheeks turned an adorable shade of red. “Well, I guess it’d be all right, if you’re willing. I’ll need to take her for obedience training, I guess.”

Seeming suddenly a little bolder in the dim parking lot lighting, Sam said, “I can handle training her for you, free of charge, and it’ll give me an excuse to visit you if that’s okay.”

It was Brenda’s turn to stutter a little. “Th-That would—I would like that. You’d do that for free?”

Sam looked a little stumped for a second but then grinned big. “Well, I do have one condition.”

Brenda said, “Sure, what is it?”

“I’ll train your puppy if you’ll dance with me.”

Brenda giggled as her puppy licked her chin and said, “Wow, that deal seems kind of one-sided in my favor.”

Sam said, “Pretty lady, you say the sweetest things.” He escorted her back into the club with a brand new spring in his step, and he was walking tall as she allowed him to lead her onto the dance floor.

I found a cardboard box and we put the puppies in the DJ booth with Dave. He loved it because it drew all the single ladies up to the booth like crazy.

After debate and numerous suggestions from the bartenders and waitresses, the puppies were named Jack, as in Jack Daniels, and Margarita, as in Brenda’s favorite drink, my Divine Margarita.

Sam and Brenda danced and talked for a while that night and then left together with their puppies.

One of my bartenders said, “A new girlfriend and a brand new puppy. Santa must have thought Sam was REALLY good this year.” From all of us at the Ranch, Have a very Merry Christmas!

©Heather Rainier 2018

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Want more Christmas Cheer, check out my Christmas short stories…

Have a friend you’d like to introduce to Divine, Texas? Need a stocking stuffer? Give them one of my boxed sets for Christmas!

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Slices of Life from the Dancing Pony

I’d Go Just About Anywhere With You

By heather.rainier One Comment
The Dancing Pony pickup line of the week is…

It all started during happy hour on Friday night with two young ladies who came in and sat at the bar. A vivacious redhead and a gorgeous, voluptuous blonde who reminded me of Grace when I’d first met her: shy and flighty.

She didn’t look around the club at all and the only person she made direct eye contact with was her friend.

They talked quietly for a while and then the redhead asked the bartender if there were any decent single men in the club who might like to dance with her friend. She placed special emphasis on the word “decent” and I understood what the redhead was asking.

The bartender said, “You’ve come to the right place. Two such beautiful ladies won’t have any trouble meeting someone. I might be able steer you in the right direction and I can point out the players you should probably avoid, as well.”

Just then three cowboys from one of Divine Creek Ranch’s neighboring ranches came in,

sat at the bar, and ordered beers. One of them is a young friend of mine named Kenny. He’s a shy but good-looking young man and has a good head on his shoulders so I asked the bartender to find a way to introduce him to the blonde.

The bartender got Kenny’s attention, pointed her out, and told him that she was in need of a dance partner and thought he might fit the bill. The bartender also said, “But go easy, she seems really shy.”

Kenny looked over and his eyebrows shot to the ceiling.

“As gorgeous as she is, she’s got no reason to be shy.”

He watched her for a few minutes, seeming to need a little time to get up his own courage and then walked up behind her and said, “Hi, I’m—”

Unfortunately, for both of them, he startled her. She twisted in her chair, gaped at him, and before he could even finish his offer of a dance, she murmured something in a breathless voice and then darted for the ladies’ room.

Her friend smiled in commiseration at Kenny and said,

“It’s not you, Cowboy. She’s a little hand-shy. We’ll be right back.” And then she hurried after her friend, muttering something about getting back on the horse.

A few minutes later they came out and the blonde approached Kenny with apology in her eyes. “I’m so sorry about that. I’d like to dance with you…if you still want to.”

Kenny gave her a friendly smile and nodded, not making any sudden movements, much like I’d seen him do when he worked with a new, skittish horse. “I’m sorry I startled you earlier. Why don’t we sit and talk first? You know, break the ice a little, and then we’ll have our dance. Would it be all right if I joined you?”

She nodded. “You don’t mind if my friend sits with us?”

Kenny said, “Of course not.”

They found three seats at the end of the bar away from other people. Kenny had eyes only for her and didn’t notice that his buddies were watching him in mild surprise.

Kenny is pretty shy himself but it looked as though finding someone even shyer than him had a way of opening him up.

The blonde said, “I’m Des—I mean my name is Courtney. Do you live in Divine, Kenny?”

“Yes, ma’am. Born and raised here. I’ve never seen you before. Are you visiting, or did you just move to town?”

Courtney gestured to her friend. “I’m staying with my friend, Maria, for now. I lived in Houston for a long time but needed—um, wanted to get out of the big city. Maria convinced me to come here.”

“I’m not much for the big city either.” He looked down at her hands, which were clenched together on the bar. He pointed at the twining vine tattoo around her ring finger. “You have a boyfriend—or husband—joining you here in Divine?”

Courtney glanced down at her hands and then covered the tattoo up with her fingertips. “No. Not at all. It’s not what you think. It’s nothing.”

Kenny clasped both of her hands with his and squeezed gently. “Sorry. I don’t need to know. I’m just glad to have the company of two beautiful ladies for the evening. Why don’t we dance?”

He was walking her back to their seats after dancing, when another man walked up, looking ripe to be cut off by the bar, and grabbed Courtney by the arm and yanked her against his chest. “My turn, Blondie.

Let’s heat up this dance floor and then, if you play your cards right, I’ll let you heat up my sheets.”

Courtney looked petrified.

Kenny didn’t hesitate. He knocked the guy halfway across the dance floor. I think he would’ve jumped on top of the asshole but Mike and Rogelio, the bouncers, held him off.

Mike slapped his back and said, “Good shot, Kenny, but from the looks of it he’s out cold. He don’t need no more. See to your lady and we’ll take it from here.”

Kenny turned back to Courtney, who looked shaken up, and took her hand. “Are you okay?”

She looked like she was holding back tears as he hugged her, and she said, “I’m sorry. You must think I’m a big, hysterical mess. I’m—”

Kenny placed a finger gently on her lips.

“I think you’re sweet, kind, and beautiful. If you don’t mind being seen with a ranch hand then I’d like to go out with you sometime.”

Her smile lit up the room as she nodded. “I think I’d go just about anywhere with you.”

She had her back turned so she missed it when Maria high-fived the bartender.

After overhearing all of this, I asked Dave the DJ to play “Anywhere With You” by Jake Owen. The couple turned back to the dance floor and I gave Dave a thumbs-up. Everything went back to normal, or at least as normal as it gets around here. I think we will see these two again. He’s one of the good guys and I hope eventually she tells him her real name. Only time will tell.

©Heather Rainier 2018

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Mood Music:

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Slices of Life from the Dancing Pony

I’m Not Interested In Your Pathetic Pickup Line, So Get Lost…

By heather.rainier 2 Comments

The Dancing Pony pickup line of the week is….

Sometimes the best pickup lines are not actually pickup lines. And how well someone can eat crow says a lot about them.

We had a good crowd this weekend, probably because of the wet weather. Construction-type work is difficult to get done when the weather is like this so we usually get an early crowd on those days.

A couple of ladies were sitting at the bar,

one blonde named Jenna and a brunette by the name of Lisa. They were discussing Jenna’s latest failed relationship when a group of cowboys who’d obviously gotten rained out of whatever they were doing came in. They gathered at the bar and ordered drinks.

Lisa said, “Look, Jenna, you’re never going to meet someone nice with that kind of attitude toward men. You need to give the nice guys a chance. You might be surprised. Look at all those cowboys that just came in. They look like decent guys. Maybe one of them will ask you to dance.”

Rolling her eyes, Jenna replied, “Yeah, sure.

I don’t have that kind of luck.”

Lisa said, “Oh, lighten up girl.”

Just then the tallest cowboy in the group started pointing in the ladies’ direction and talking to his buddies.

Lisa nudged Jenna and said, “Look, I think the tall one is pointing at you.”

The men turned away and were laughing and joking about something. With a blush in her cheeks Jenna turned her back on them and said, “See? All men are alike. They only have one thing on their minds and as long as they can crow with their buddies they don’t care about anything else.”

Lisa said, “You don’t know what they’re saying. Maybe he likes how you look and he’s trying to get up the guts to ask you to dance.

If he comes over here you’d better be nice.”

Jenna pointed at herself and then looked at Lisa as if she’d taken leave of her senses. “Oh yeah, I’ll be nice all right. Nice and loud.”

The tall cowboy walked over to the ladies. Right when he got close to them Jenna turned, looked up at him, and in a loud voice said, “No, it didn’t hurt.”

The cowboy blinked in confusion. Opened his mouth to speak but halted. Tilted his head at her and finally said, “I’m sorry, what?”

Jenna scoffed and replied, “I’m not into whatever you think I’m into and

I’m not interested in your pathetic pickup line, so get lost.”

The cowboy backed away a half a step and put up his hands mildly in surrender. “Well…that’s okay, pretty lady, because

I was just headed over to speak with that man.”

He pointed at the man sitting a couple of chairs down from Jenna, and then turned his crooked grin back to her. “Although, I am wondering a few other things at the moment.”

He tipped his hat, and continued on past her to the man he needed to talk to. After his conversation he returned to his seat, nodding at her as he passed by but not stopping.

Jenna sat back and put her hands over her red face. “I am such a bitch.”

Her friend chuckled and said, “I told you to be nice.

That missed the mark by a mile, sweetie.”

Jenna said, “I’ve had such terrible luck lately, I assumed he was talking about me when he was pointing and laughing. My instincts are usually better. I don’t know what to think anymore.”

Lisa said, “Well, this is what you get for thinking the worst. You could buy him a drink and say you’re sorry.”

“You think that would change anything now?

I’m sure he thinks I’m psycho.”

Lisa laughed and said, “And he’d be correct. Give the guy a little credit. He might surprise you. At the very least, you do owe him the apology and a drink might be a great way to break the ice.”

So Jenna ordered the whole group of cowboys a round of drinks and told the bartender to tell the tall cowboy she was sorry for her lapse in judgment.

After the bartender delivered the message, the tall cowboy came over and took off his hat. “Hello, ladies. I’m Jeremy, but my friends call me Tex. Look, I’m sorry about my part in the misunderstanding earlier. We’re a loud bunch and I can see how you might’ve thought I was pointing at you and talking about you. Those guys all work for me and we got rained out today on a job.” He gestured to his shirt, which was clearly damp. “Right when we got here, I noticed that man was wearing the type of waterproof and flame resistant coat I’ve been looking for and I wanted to find out if he bought it around here because I could use one. That’s all I was doing, but I can understand why you mistook it.”

Red-faced, Jenna introduced herself and Lisa, and said, “I’m so sorry about that.

I haven’t had the best luck with men lately.

That doesn’t excuse my rudeness to you but it’s very sweet of you to understand.”

Tex said, “Well, consider the slate completely clean then, Jenna. Now, if you’d do me the honor of dancing with me,

Maybe I could change your luck a little.”

Lisa lightly jabbed Jenna in the ribs and whispered, “You’d better go dance with him because if you don’t, I’m jumping his bones right here and now.”

They danced together a lot that night, and exchanged information before leaving, so I’m pretty sure we’ll see them together again.

©Heather Rainier 2018

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